Not Ready

AND I am back.....thanks for waiting so patiently while I had some events happen, so that I could let you guys in on the secrets of my excitement filled life. Here goes, the events of the weekend. Try and keep up.

Friday night.

Dinner at my favorite restaurant in Dallas, Glorias. It is Equdorian food and MUY EXCELLENTE. That means UM UM GOOD in espanol.

Back to Ron's house so that he and Tony could talk about their cars sit in them, and act moderatly straight while I drink a Screwdriver. Two hours of that and I head into the tsunami that had made its way into the metroplex while running for my life trying to stay dry. Seriously, I could have drown on the way home.

Back at la casa, I sat up and talked to someone, you know who you are, until about 1 and then headed to bed, thankful that Saturday was the next day and that I could sleep in.

No such luck.

At 800 am my phone rings. Ron sounding very jovial for this early Saturday hour. He requests that I take him to the airport so that he can hop on a jet plane to New Orleans for a weekend of enjoying the debauchery that is Mardi Gras.

In exchange I get to drive around while he is gone in the Benz. I agree. Track pants, a long sleeve T and teeth brushing later I meet him at the gate to my apartment. He peels out causing a yellow light on his dash to warn him of the traction control problems that might arise from continuing to operate the vehicle in a similar manner. Fear on my part for the 2 minutes that it takes us to get to Love Field. We arrive unscathed and he hops out to catch his plane but not before he tells me.

"Stay at the house, that way I know nothing is going wrong" "You can drive my cars, but DON'T drive the BMW"

BASTARD!!!!!! Although it was disgusting, cold, and wet out on Saturday, Sunday was prime time convertible weather and I would be taunted by it being parked in the garage. Oh well, no complaints, I am tooling around in a big Mercedes sedan.

I spend most of Saturday doing nothing. In my track pants. I eventually took a shower but track pants were the wear of the day until 630. That is when it happened.

I did it. I went out on a date. The first real one since the dreaded day in early January. I can tell you from that single experience, I. AM. NOT. READY. End of story. We had a great time, he was funny and so was I, we had intelligent conversation and kept it lighthearted, but I am just not ready to dive off into something again. Luckily, he understands this and agrees.

I refuse to be the serial monogomist. We all know them. The ones that hop from one relationship to the next never really recovering from the angst and anguish.

I think that you have to have some sort of emotional healing time in between daters.

Even though he was HOTTIE MCHOTT.

Seriously. One of those that you aren't really sure if you want to date or just put next to the fireplace as an art piece.

After we went to dinner we went out and met some of his friends. Yeah, talk about intimidating, go out with a guy in which EVERY SINGLE HEAD turns when he walks by and I mean every one.

Men, women, children, inanimate objects, none of them could seem to take their eyes off of him. This happened at the restaurant too but not as much as at the bar.

I felt good and I looked good too. We went to the Round-Up, which is sort of like Brokeback Mountain to the tenth degree. Cowboys everywhere. Dancing, singing, drinking, kissing. Yeah, I know, it freaked me out a little too the first time that I went there. We two-stepped. Actually, he two stepped and I tried not to two step on him but I caught on pretty quickly. The gays. We are a quick bunch.

We go out, I spend WAY too much money (as usual) and then we go home. This is the tricky part because I have two options here.

#1 Kiss good night and go home being the ever prudish like good boy that I can be when I so choose.

or

#2 Get down and dirty with Hottie McHott.

Okay, to be honest, it was a hard choice. #2 would have been SOOOO good but knowing me, knowing what I have been emotionally going through in the past month or two, and knowing that sex has become too emotional to let it be casual (DAMN CONSCIENCE) I chose #1. Kiss good night and head home.

NOT BEFORE stopping at Whata Burger for my potato taquito. I had danced hard and could use the calories.

Yesterday, nothing. I got up, washed the Benz, got cruised at the carwash (seriously CAN YOU NOT DO ANYTHING IN THIS TOWN??) and went to lunch with Tony. He is my therapy away from my therapist and always willing to listen. Sometimes he doesnt tell me what I want to hear but that is probably why I talk to him so much. I spent two hours on the phone with my ADHAMPTO and then drove and listened to music with the windows down and the sunroof open.

That is my relaxation. That is my meditation.

When the world is coming right at me and making me a LITTLE stressed out, I drive. I load up the iPod with faves and drive around just thinking about everything and nothing all at the same time. Very relaxing. Breeze in your hair and a shiny hood ornament to look at.

I am sure you kids are bored by now. Nothing really funny to tell just my life. But, in short, I am not ready, so I am going to stick to my guns and just be by myself for a while. Date Britt exclusively because from what I can remember about dating him before, he is a really great guy.